Sometimes I Get Mad and Want to Quit

Article / 30 May 2021

I'm *beginning* to better understand the emotional rollercoaster within creative work. This ride used to turn my stomach in anxiety, but the inevitable dips are becoming easier to handle.  Here's what it sometimes looks like for me within illustration work:

1) The "ugly phase" of establishing the design.  I rarely share progress at this point.  Just working, reworking, and reworking again.  I'm frustrated often and tired always.  Then, a light begins to grow in the distance.  I feel a bit better with every session.

2) Refinements and details.  This feels wonderfully indulgent.  I've put in the foundational work and add that ~razzle-dazzle~. I excitedly share progress with friends.  Life is good.

3) Nearing completion.  I've pushed as far as I can and share progress with mentors/peers, asking for critiques.   I make a list of necessary corrections.  (Note to self: take a day to enjoy what you've done before seeking critique, otherwise you'll become sad and moody).  Usually, I become sad and moody.

4) Take a breath, realize critiques do not signal failure, but reveal potential for greatness.  Begin checking off corrections, repeat steps 3-4 as needed.  Grab the handlebar tight as your emotions settle out from this process.

5) True Completion.  Obtain ice cream.  Nap for a week straight. 

I'm discovering the key to finishing quality artwork is to stay humble when feeling high, and hopeful when feeling low.  Maybe you've felt this way too, and the "lows" make you too nauseous and sweaty to continue.  Realize there isn't anything wrong with you; this is inherent to the creative process.  If you feel this, it means you're growing!  Pause if need be, but don't quit.  Keep at it friends.